Written by Jennifer Moglia
As a young, not-quite-straight but not-quite-gay girl and an avid music fan, there’s one thing that’s more important to me than just about anything; representation. Growing up, the closest thing I got to seeing lesbian representation was when my grandma would watch The Ellen Show when I was a toddler or when my friends and I discovered “Glee” on Netflix in middle school.
Being able to see yourself in the communities that mean so much to you is crucial for a young person’s confidence, and it’s something that’s been missing from the forefront of alternative music for a while. How many alternative bands with a woman or non-binary person as the singer get compared to Hayley Williams and Paramore? Just about all of them.
Over the past few years, as I’ve navigated high school and my own sexuality, among many other things, I started to see myself in alternative music the way that a younger me dreamed of. I got to see Hayley Kiyoko sing “girls like girls like boys do” in a packed arena as she opened for Panic! at the Disco, watch Halsey kiss a girl in her “Ghost” music video, and much, much more.
Artists like the ones previously mentioned, along with King Princess, Clairo, and Mary Lambert, among others, helped me feel more at home in my own skin and within the music that I loved. However, Marie Ulven, better known as girl in red, took this feeling to a whole new level.
After hearing her song “i wanna be your girlfriend” in a TikTok video in November 2019, I absolutely fell in love with girl in red, not only for her sound and lyrics but for the way she wasn’t afraid to sing about being a woman and loving another woman. The use of the name “Hannah” throughout the track made it clear that she was singing about wanting to be another girl’s girlfriend, and she wasn’t going to shy away from it.
I continued to make my way through Ulven’s discography through the end of 2019 and into 2020, stumbling upon the chilled-out autumn romance of “We Fell In Love In October” as well as the hectic, energetic blast of joy that is “bad idea!”, and loving every minute of it. As always, there was no beating around the bush here when it came to the singer’s sexuality; she says it herself in fan-favorite “Girls”, proclaiming, “They're so pretty, it hurts / I'm not talking 'bout boys, I'm talking 'bout girls.”
Before her first record was even a thought in my mind, I was already endlessly thankful for girl in red and the representation that she brought to the table in the abyss that is alternative music. I didn’t think I could love her more until she announced her debut album and dropped an honest song about struggling with mental health called “Serotonin” alongside it; I was promptly proven wrong.
The record opens with that lead single, setting the tone immediately with to-the-point lyrics and an electrifying beat produced by FINNEAS. You can read our full review of the track here.
“Did You Come?” sits in the track two spot, seeing Ulven deal with being cheated on, particularly wanting to know anything and everything about the other woman that her girlfriend was seeing while simultaneously not wanting to know a single thing about the situation. The lyrics alternate between tongue-in-cheek and deeply emotional, sung over a peppy instrumental.
Up next is “Body and Mind”, which lyrically deals with concepts of self-love and self-hatred, as girl in red tries to comfort and accept herself, flaws and all. This song also holds the first mention of the album’s title; “Been in the deep end since I realized / There is a difference between body and mind / If I could make it go quiet inside / Get some rest for my weary eyes.”
“hornylovesickmess” and “midnight love” are both songs about being used in a sexual relationship, one from the perspective of Ulven who was doing the using, and one from the perspective of the friend that she was using. Though the former pokes fun at the narrator and the latter, originally released in April 2020, is a lot more emotionally intense and melancholy, it’s very cool to see both sides of this situation back-to-back on the album.
The last single released before the LP dropped, “You Stupid Bitch” is one of the catchiest tracks on this full-length, seeing energy-filled verses paired with soaring choruses. Lyrically, it explores having to comfort someone you have feelings for, knowing that you could give them everything they want and more, but watching them continue to get into relationships with unhealthy people, similar to pop hits like “You Belong With Me” by Taylor Swift and “Treat You Better” by Shawn Mendes.
Initially released in August 2020, the lyrics of “rue” see girl in red singing to her sister, whose bed she slept in for weeks because she was so paranoid; Ulven told Apple Music, “Every time I was about to fall asleep, I felt like my heart stopped beating, so I’d want to be in her bed in case I died...This is singing to my family and loved ones that I want to get better... don’t want to make it worse for you guys. It’s also about realizing that you have to do the work. If you want to get better mentally, or if you struggle with depression or anxiety, it’s such a heavy realization figuring out that it’s you who has to do it.” Sonically, this is one of my favorite songs on the record, and combined with girl in red’s emotional delivery of each line, it’s a masterpiece.
Three of the album’s later songs, “Apartment 402”, “.”, and “Call You Mine” are super interesting sonically while remaining different lyrically, exploring themes like having trust issues in a relationship, dealing with the aftermath of a breakup, and the darkest sides of depression. Ulven’s versatility becomes extremely evident in this stretch, and she truly comes into her own as a powerhouse of a musician.
The closing track, “it would feel like this” is completely instrumental with no lyrics, just a melodic, classical piano playing. The title serves as the continuation of the LP’s title, completing the phrase so it reads, “if i could make it go quiet, it would feel like this”, suggesting that this is what Ulven’s brain sounded like after the cathartic emotional release she carried out over the last 33 minutes and 16 seconds.
On her debut full-length, girl in red proves that she is a force to be reckoned with musically, but also continues to be someone for girls, young and old, questioning their sexuality or simply looking to feel comfortable in who they are. If this is only the beginning, we can only imagine what will come next for this rising star.
Marie Ulven’s new album as girl in red, “if i could make it go quiet”, is available to stream on all platforms; to support girl in red, you can pick something up from her merch store or follow her on Twitter @_GirlInRed_. Be sure to share your thoughts on the album with us by tweeting us @lgndsoftmrw!